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Cohabitation Quiz

Let's take a summer break from the usual, same-old (yawn) essay format and sprinkle some questions about living together as a lifestyle choice and (quite possibly) rebellion against marriage. My nationwide survey saw it coming, this fast-growing option, but no one could have predicted its overwhelming numbers. As it turns out, this extra-legal lifestyle is the choice of millions.

Dare I ask the reasons for their choice? You betcha.

--If you were to split up today, how would you explain it to the kids? What do you tell them currently about their household?

--If there's a former spouse in the picture, how do you handle the children's visits? Do you know what that former spouse has to say about their living arrangement?

--Do you plan to marry your partner? Has the issue been discussed in your relationship?

--Do you want your children to handle their lives as you do? Do you believe this is a good example for them to follow?

--What last name do you use? Under what name are the children enrolled in school?

--How do you and your partner handle the finances of your family? Do you have your own bank account, or do you combine them?

--Is this a test for marriage or a full-fledged way of life for you? If this current relationship were to end, would you consider cohabiting again?

--Were there unexpected issues that arose in this relationship? How did you resolve them?

--How do your parents -- and those of your partner -- feel about your lifestyle?

--Do you encourage the grandparents' (both sets) influence in the children's lives?

--What are the reasons you and your partner don't marry? Do you both agree on them?

--How prepared were you for cohabitation? How did you prepare your children for it?

--What do you see as the advantages and disadvantages of living together?

--What do you tell your employer and co-workers (when asked) about your marital status?

--Would you advise other single people to live together, as a test for compatibility or as a way of life?

--Is there a sense of freedom in this relationship because it lacks legal sanction? Does your partner feel the same?

--Do you feel as committed as you believe you would in a legalized marriage? Does your partner feel the same?

Have the fun of tickling your little gray cells with these questions ... even with virtual answers. (Life is like a box of chocolates, remember? You never know what you're going to get.) Besides, no one but you will see your responses. Well, this is where we part company, until next time.

Have a question for Susan? You can reach her directly at susan@single-file.com. We've uncovered another treasure trove of "Single File" paperbacks - in perfect condition, signed by Susan, ready to enjoy. Send $15 and your address: Susan Deitz, C/O Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.